A concept: Steve, with super soldier sensitive nose, finds women smell a lot better than men. Not that men smell bad, just… women seem to use more subtle floral or fruity smelling things. Men’s stuff is always spicy in some way. The first time he went to buy himself soap and he swiveled down the men’s aisle he was nearly knocked off his feet by the smell. (He has JARVIS order his soap now.) The women’s aisle is cloying but not bad.
So he can’t understand why Tony always smells so good.
It drives him absolutely bananas. When they’re in the decontamination showers, Tony still smells good, even with the plain soaps everyone has to use. Sometimes Bruce has to use his shower but he never smells the same as Tony. Steve’s even gone so far as to sneak into Tony’s bathroom (and then been shocked by the sheer amount of product that exists in Tony’s shower) and try and sniff out what exactly it is, but he can’t find it. He figures it’s just something that’s specifically Tony.
And then he sees Tony rubbing something creamy onto his bruised arm after a battle. The only reason he doesn’t tackle Tony to the ground is because he saw him get thrown into a building and he’s probably sore. “WHAT’S THAT!” he bellows without meaning to, making every Avenger except for Bruce jump, and that’s only because Bruce is passed out across Thor’s lap. Tony stares at him in terror before cautiously answering, “A bruise cream?” He makes a startled, squeaky noise as Steve lunges at him, pressing his nose to his skin. There. That’s the smell. “What’s in it,” he hisses like some sort of goblin. “…Aloe and arnica?” Tony squeaks. “It smells good,” Steve tells him with perhaps more aggression than he means to again. “…Thank you,” Tony says after a minute, at a loss for literally any other words.
Steve: WHAT’S THAT!!!
Tony: …. A Bruise Cream…?
Steve: w HATs’ IN IT
Tony: Aloe and arnica…?
Steve: ….
I had to. I just had to. God, @reioka, your ideas!!! Just. Your IDEAS!!!
