Hey, I understand if you’re too busy with your health stuff to help me out with this, but I was hoping you could help me come up with a few affectionate sibling insults? I’m prepping for a D&D game I run and there’s an npc that the party is going to deal with who is the brother of a different npc. I’ve decided he’s all business, unless you get him talking about his brother. At which point he starts telling embarrassing stories and liberally insulting his bro affectionately. (1/2)
I’m pretty sure I’ve seen you come up with some really good ones that
specifically involve the word “walnut”, but I went a few pages through
your blog doing ctrl f to try and find them but the only one I could
find was “fucking walnut”. While that is delightful, it’s slightly less
creative than I remembered/was hoping for. Help? (2/2)
HmmmMMmmmm lets see now. Putting the word “absolute” in front of just about any food is going to be a classic. As is the word “total”.
“You absolute walnut”
“You total cabbage.”
other fun insults you can use without being too mean could include “don’t mind him he’s just woken up. It’ll take another while before his brain arrives.”
“You really are an absolute pillock sometimes.” (A politer way of calling someone a “dick”, originates in the 16th century when it was definitely not considered polite.)
“Watch you don’t trip over those apron stings“ works well if the other brother is younger and implies they are too young to be out adventuring with them and should still be at home with their mam.
“you could start a fight in an empty house”
“don’t worry, he excels at bullshit.”
“you have the emotional depth and maturity of a tea spoon”
“you’re as stealthy as a one man marching band falling down the stairs”
“you’re about as much use as a chocolate tea kettle you are”
“you, a hero? well desperate times call for desperate measures…”
I’m sure there’s others I could think of, but I think I’ll throw it open to the floor 😀