My cat is touched-starved and demanding because everyone else but me is unwilling to pet her. They are unwilling to pet her because she is a bad person who loves crime and hurting people. She doesn’t understand how these things are connected and so I must bear the full load of both her affection and her bloodthirsty violence.
#she is currently poking holes in my body and vibrating
#while i am still bleeding from when i reached towards my computer and she decided that was punishable