wilwheaton:

I can’t help you with that last part, but I want you to know that I see you and I love you for who you are. My friend, Robyn, is the co-founder of mytranshealth, and maybe that’s a good starting point to connect with a support network? I’m so sorry if it’s massively inappropriate for me to suggest that. 

But the first part? Maybe I can help a little bit? Being rejected sucks, and it hurts. In my life and work (I’ve tried and not always succeeded to separate the two) I’ve worked very hard to remind myself that it’s never personal when I don’t get a job. It sure feels like it, though, and getting up to try again after I’ve been rejected is always hard.

In The Nerdist Way, Hardwick tells us that our brains try to protect us, and they try to stop us from taking chances because if we don’t take the chance, we can’t be disappointed or hurt. Our brains are trying to do us a kindness, but they actually aren’t helping, so we have to make the deliberate choice to tell our brains to back off and take care of other stuff.

That is so much easier said than done, but the only way we can get used to it is by practicing it.

Also, 2:30 in the morning is one of those parts of the day when everything feels much worse or much better than it actually is. I’ve reblogged a thing here a few times that reminds us to go for a walk, to get into a change of clothes, to eat a good meal, to do things that we maybe aren’t doing, because doing those things breaks the cycle of depression. You can’t do that at 2:30 in the morning, really, but if you feel like you’re not going to go to sleep anyway, maybe take a nice hot shower? Make a cup of tea and sit down with a book you like, or an episode of a show that you like? I’ve been listening to audiobooks on Spotify when I need my brain to fuck off and let me sleep. I’ve heard the first chapter of The Metamorphosis for like five days in a row, and that guy’s voice is great at soothing me to sleep. The recordings come from LibreVox, so maybe you can find something there?

I feel like I’m not being as helpful as I’d like to be. I want to reveal a great secret that makes it all so much easier, but the truth is that everything worth doing is hard, and You from the Future will be so grateful to You From Now because You From Now faced the fear and accepted the challenge of risking the rejection so you could find employment for Future You.

I really hope some of this helps. Maybe someone else on Tumblr has better words of comfort or wisdom to share? I’d love it if you’d check in with me, and let me know how you’re doing, whenever you’re ready.

nixcraft:

wilwheaton:

mackenzie-bree:

Do you ever notice yourself getting bad again…like, you know you’re not doing work that needs to be done, you know you’re not cleaning, you know you’re not taking care of yourself…you know all the things you need to do to start trying to feel better. But you just can’t. And you’re left feeling like shit bc you thought you were getting better but here we are

Oh hey that’s me today.

wilwheaton:

mackenzie-bree:

Do you ever notice yourself getting bad again…like, you know you’re not doing work that needs to be done, you know you’re not cleaning, you know you’re not taking care of yourself…you know all the things you need to do to start trying to feel better. But you just can’t. And you’re left feeling like shit bc you thought you were getting better but here we are

Oh hey that’s me today.