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*slides into your dm’s* hi hope :) how’s it going hope :) no i’m not dead :) I was wondering, in case nobody’s asked you yet and you have the time and will to do it…45 or 58 for the drabble challenge? one or the other or both? tysm ily <3 -kaleb

the-great-escapism:

58. “You smell like a wet dog.”

“What do you mean you’ve never played in the rain before?” Peter asks, giving Tony an incredulous look.

Tony shrugs. “I’ve been caught in the rain before, which is basically the same thing, and I’d imagine it’s just as unpleasant.”

“But that’s different!” Peter protests. “When you’re caught in the rain, of course it’s unpleasant! You didn’t, like, consent to it.”

Tony stares at him, eyebrows raised. “Excuse me?”

Peter cringes, face reddening. “Okay, not the best way I could have phrased that. But you know what I mean.”

“I really don’t think I do,” Tony tells him, eyes sparkling with amusement at the look on the kid’s face. It doesn’t last long, though. Peter’s face brightens suddenly with excitement, and Tony groans inwardly.

“Well, there’s no time like the present to fix that!” Peter says enthusiastically, looking to where the rain is pattering against the window.

This time Tony groans audibly. “Absolutely not. I’m – busy. Paperwork. You know how it is in the life of a genius, billionaire, philanthropist. Sorry, it can’t be helped,” Tony says, not sounding sorry at all.

Peter crosses his arms over his chest and scowls. “Come on, this is the best time for it! There’s not even any lightening or thunder.”

Tony toys with his tablet to avoid looking Peter straight in his puppy eyes, knowing that as soon as he does, the battle will be lost. “Sorry, kid. Things to do. Places to be.”

“You’ve been sitting here for the last two hours watching Cap’s PSA videos on repeat and laughing,” Peter points out. “I’ll tell Pepper about that time you lost control of your gauntlet and burnt a hole through her favorite painting and had to pay for the original artist to replicate it,” he threatens smugly.

“Oh, you little shit.” Tony narrows his eyes at him. He huffs, feeling himself already giving in. Brat. “Fine. But only for a minute.”

“Yes!” Peter cheers triumphantly, grabbing Tony’s arm and hauling him to his feet. “It’s be great, I promise.” The kid looks so damn excited as he drags them to the door leading outside the Compound that Tony can’t help the small smile that comes to his face.

Tony stops them right before they step out, staring dubiously at the falling rain. “Is this really necessary?”

“It’s practically a rite of passage, old man,” Peter insists.

“Um, who do you think you’re call-” Tony doesn’t get a chance to finish before Peter flings the door open and tugs him into the rain. “Jesus, that’s cold!”

Peter just laughs loudly and runs forward, holding out his arms enthusiastically as rain quickly starts soaking through his clothes. Tony curses under his breath as the cold water seeps to his skin, and he shivers lightly.

“Don’t be a baby, Mr. Stark!” Peter taunts with a mischievous look on his face. He quickly darts a hand out and taps Tony’s arm, and Tony gives him a baffled look. “Tag, you’re it!” Peter calls before running off.

Tony closes his eyes for a second, wondering how the hell his life has come to this. “Really? Oh, that’s not childish at all!” Tony says sarcastically, but Peter just looks back at him with a dopey smile.

And all at once, it hits Tony: Peter still is a kid. He just rarely gets a chance to act like one. Tony shakes his head and wipes the water out of his eyes, grumbling, “I’m too old for this,” before taking off after the kid.

Peter yelps delightedly, slipping and sliding on the wet grass as he runs. It’s an unfair game from the start – Peter is younger and more sure-footed as he runs, while Tony is struggling not to fall and bust his knees.

Sure enough, Tony hits a slippery patch of mud, and his feet skid before he loses his footing entirely. “Shit!” he curses loudly, and Peter stops and looks at him, eyes wide.

“Mr. Stark, are you -” Peter starts to go to his aid, but Tony pushes himself up on his elbows, cringing at the squelching sound. He doesn’t need to look to know he’s covered in mud. He glares at Peter, who looks like he’s biting back a laugh now that he sees Tony’s okay.

“You, Mr. Parker, are entirely too clean,” Tony tells him, and the smile dies from Peter’s face as horror takes over. Tony smirks playfully and lurches to his feet. He commands his suit to form around his feet and hands, letting it lift him into the air and hover above the ground.

“Wait, that’s not fair!” Peter whines, already taking off across the field.

Tony flies after him, staying close to the ground. “Who said anything about fair?”

As Tony gets closer, Peter starts zig-zagging, and Tony lets out a bark of laughter. “I’m not a damn crocodile, Pete! That’s not going to help you.” Tony reaches out to grab him, but Peter ducks his head out of the way and tries to double back.

“I don’t think so!” Tony flips in the air and follows him.

“Oh, come on!” Peter exclaims in exasperation. “It’s not my fault you can’t keep up and fell!”

Tony laughs in disbelief. “Well, now you’ve done it. No mercy from me, kiddo.”

Tony lines up next to Peter and snags his arm, retracting the pieces of his suit and letting them both fall to the ground, angling himself so Peter doesn’t take the brunt of the fall.

Peter yelps loudly and wiggles, trying to escape Tony’s grip as the man carefully pushes Peter into the mud, laughing at the look of disgust on his face.

Mr. Stark!” Peter yells, swatting his mentor away, even as he grins widely, accepting his defeat. Content that the kid is now just as dirty as him, Tony pushes himself to his feet and holds out a hand to Peter, who clumsily pulls himself up.

“You played dirty!” Peter accuses him, giving Tony a mock pout.

“Literally, it seems,” Tony jokes. Peter rolls his eyes. “Oh, come here,” Tony says, slinging an arm around the kid and pulling him to his side.

“No, I’m mad at you.” Peter bats at his arm half-heartedly, even as he leans into the embrace.

“No, you’re not,” Tony says matter-of-factly, ruffling his hair as they head back into the building and out of the rain. He scrunches his nose. “You smell like a wet dog.”

“And who’s fault is that?” Peter says pointedly.

“Uh… yours, actually. It was your idea to play in the rain,” Tony reminds him.

“Whatever,” Peter says, and Tony laughs.

“Come on, kid. Let’s get changed before Pepper comes in and yells at us for tracking mud into the building.”

smallest-feeblest-boggart:

viterbofangirl:

hellenhighwater:

hellenhighwater:

mewwitch:

yawpkatsi:

hellenhighwater:

yawpkatsi:

Concept: Some jackass shows Bucky how to make a blog and it becomes really popular. Not because it’s the blog of James Buchanan Barnes, American Legend, War Hero, Infamous Assassin, Alleged Terrorist. Nobody even knows it’s his blog. It gets really popular because people think it’s a really great shitpost generator or something. Because Bucky is just a Weird Fucking Person and everything he posts on his fucking personal blog comes off as somewhere between dril and Jaden Smith and people are like “this is some quality garbage right here” and thus Accidental Memelord Bucky is born.

Bucky posts things like

“What is wrong with bananas. I ate a banana today and it was Wrong. America why”

“Every time I put on my eye makeup it gets bigger. My whole face is eyeliner now.”

“Why does friendship feel so much like punching”

“When I wake up in the middle of the night I am either thinking ‘who am I? does my life have meaning?’ or “did I already eat all of the plums?’”

“Why are you so grumpy” they ask me. they do not realize this is just my Face.”

“I know i said i would give my left arm for a cup of coffee but i am more awake now and i would like my arm back please”

“I guess I must have done something horrible in a past life. I mean. I definitely did something horrible in this life, so. “

OMG I LOVEEEE

YEEESSSSSSS!

“Guy in front of me won’t move his car seat up. I think that might still be upset about all those times I tried to kill him.”

“Got lectured by a guy who had been complaining about how things were Back In The Day. I don’t understand why he got upset. I too lived through the Great Depression and was drafted for the War.”

“The economy in this century sucks. Who exactly though another Stock Market crash was a good idea?”

“Apparently, it was Rude™ of me to pitch in my two cents on a conversation I happened to overhear, despite agreeing with them. On an unrelated note, I am no longer allowed in the ceiling vents.”

“‘If you don’t behave we’ll send (mutual) after you.’ Jokes on them. I’m the one who trained them to be an assassin in the first place.”

“Tried to buy a Chicken Dinner candy bar at the supermarket today. Turns out they were discontinued 54 years ago. Super bummed.”

“Wait. People were on the moon?! We got into space? There is a way off of this rock?! Why am I only just hearing about this?!”

“’Have you been living under a rock the past 50 years?’ No I was cryogenically frozen for 70. I don’t appreciate your tone young man.”

“My friend likes convincing people that I’m the Reckless one in our friendship. As if he won’t find an alley behind a bar to pick a fight in if I take my eyes off him for two seconds.”

“Why would i want to get a haircut when instead I can look like i just returned from a 12 year jaunt in the wilderness every time i grow a beard”

“was having a hard time finding noodles in the grocery store & asked a clerk for help. she looked at me like a crazy person. lady, it’s not my fault you don’t speak russian”

“what kind of idiot thinks dancers are sissies? literally every ballerina i have ever met could kill an adult man with just her legs”

“today i discovered Conditioner. the future is a miracle and my hair like a cloud now”

“apparently just jumping on to a moving bus when you are running late is not a thing people do anymore. please stop yelling at me.”

“went to a club last night to see what the hip kids were into. apparently the latest thing is just having sex standing up with your clothes on in a room full of people.”

“on the one hand, people dressed much nicer in the 40s. on the other hand, yoga pants.”

“rode in a car with heated seats today. it is my house now. i live here.”

“i have acquired a small bear. i am putting a collar and leash on him. he is my dog. no one tell animal control”

“i am working on this whole Good Guy thing but anyone who cuts me in line at starbucks deserves to have their kneecaps shot out okay”

“why did they have to make escalators so terrifying to get on and off of? from now on I’m just jumping off the mall balconies. none of this awful moving teeth staircase”

“i don’t care if it’s a ‘priceless historical artifact,’ punk, i didn’t wanna do the dishes and it makes a pretty good spaghetti bowl”

“hoodie pockets are so great. i can fit like three sandwiches and a grenade in there and my hands are still warm”

“i really though we would have flying cars by now. the future is such a letdown.”

“changed sam’s ringtone to jesus take the wheel.”

“do you know that feeling when you go to lean on your short friend’s conveniently arm-rest-height shoulder but you forget they had a huge growth spurt and you just awkwardly lean your elbow into the middle of their bicep”

“i swear i didn’t know your girlfriend was coming over. i always ominously clean my assault weapons on the coffee table like that. it had nothing to do with you.”

#peter follows the blog and has no idea its bucky (via themoonstarwarrior)

ahsjfjsa while Bucky was frozen the most common variety of bananas died out, we have a different now. he’s right the banana was Wrong

anxieteandbiscuits:

this scene was just everything. because its so domestic and, if you think about it, these three are really like the only 3 who consistently got on well with each other. and its just so sweet. brulk (?) smiling softly coz he’s with an old love and his science bro. nat thinking aloud knowing she’s just had an epiphany when there’s a genius either side of her. tony being able to relax for once. because he knows these two understand him and what he does. its beautiful

bigstarkenergy:

memory

The public celebrates Natasha.

Clint laughs at the statues they build, at the wakes they hold. He scoffs at the businessmen and politicians who say that they owe her their lives.

Fuck yeah you do, he thinks, chucking a plum at the TV screen.

He thinks of the hundreds of Shield agents who called Tasha a commie behind her back, the ones who whispered that she was a traitor, a spy, a killer, a mercenary without mercy. The ones who looked at him as if he’d painted a target on his back, just by happening to see something in a girl brainwashed to kill.

He thinks of the people that praised Captain America but tore Tasha down, calling her a spy, a traitor, a b*tch and a sl*t. He thinks of the men bitching about her being a hero, the right wing cowards too scared to fight themselves, but all too willing to tear down Tasha.

He thinks of how Tasha released her entire record, her crimes, her murders, her darkest nightmares, to the public. For anyone to see.

He thinks of Tasha not caring about anyone but the people she’d sworn to protect. Not caring about the opinions tossed at her, not caring about anything other than keeping people safe.

They call her a hero, they say that she saved billions, and Clint laughs.

Of course she did, he thinks, looking up at her statue. She was always a hero.

After all, there was always a reason Clint chose her in the first place.