science-jumps:

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses:

brendalltherock:

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses:

i absolutely do

mmmmmkay, so lemme preface this with that I live in a small town of 2,000 people in AL

so a couple of weeks ago, the cops went to my great uncle’s house to arrest my cousin (im gonna call her K) for a “felony” (no one knows exactly why, but there is a lot of material the cops could have pulled from). once they got to the house and went up to knock on the door, and found another one of my cousins hiding place where he grew his weed plants. so then that cousin (let’s call him J). So K isnt at my great uncles house, but they caught and arrested J on a distribution and paraphernalia charge. So the cops are still looking for K, and they wind up going to her daughter’s house, to find her youngest (S) hiding her sons father, who is wanted for murder in Birmingham. So now S and her ex are arrested for that, and they picked up S’s older sister while they were there because she was on parole and was caught up with S’s shit. K still hasnt been found. The cops wind up going to my other cousin’s who live across the road from us (who are Js parents and Ks brother and sister in law) to look for K and wind up arresting my great uncle (who was at their house???? instead of his own???) because he pulled a gun on the cops, then arresting Js dad bc he punched the cop who handcuffed my great uncle. and K? she was across the street breaking into my car and stealing mywallet. the only reason we found this out is because when I went to pick my wallet up from the police station I saw all of my family’s names on the “in custody” board and my mom called the on call chief bc apparently she dated him in college and he owed her a favor.

tl;dr: all of my grandmother’s 2nd oldest brother’s family got arrested except for his son’s daughter because she moved out of this hell hole as soon as she graduated highschool

it’s 2:15 am and this is the BEST bedtime story anyone’s ever told me

Alabama is discount Florida