I find that if I’m wearing Real Adult Business Clothes my worksona can do things like call people and check my inbox, whereas pajamas hellen mostly wants to shovel hamburgers into her face and set things on fire.
Over the weekend it seemed like a solid trade agreement – putting the
trade war on hold for 90 days – had been made between the United States
and China. And then Trump couldn’t resist Twitter, where, over a few
posts, he warned that if the deal didn’t happen, he was a “Tariff Man.”
Following his toxic tweets, the Dow Jones industrial fell 705 points, or
nearly 3%. The Nasdaq fell 3.1%.
instead try; I love you *generic keysmash* h OW DA RE *lavish praise* *inside fandom joke* *quote fave part* *more generic keysmashing*
you. i like you
Also, the favorites: 1) DID I SAY YOU COULD HURT ME LIKE THIS?!?;?!; 2) DONT HURT MY BABY WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS 3) why must you hurt me this way 4) WHY IS THIS A CLIFFHANGER?! WHAT HAPPENS NEXT I NEED TO KNOW 5) This made me cry/squeal/giggle/wake the dead with my laughter 6) I almost woke my family laughing at ___ part 7) I DIDNT KNOW I NEEDED THIS AU UNTIL YOU POSTED THIS 8) this is so cute I’m dying 9) and (writer’s name) strikes again! 10) I had to reread this bc it’s so good and I love it 11) I wish I could like/heart/kudos this more than once Like, seriously guys, freak out with us and you’ll have us wrapped around your little fingers.
This is so true! A lot of the time, I get stuck in a writer’s hole. But whenever I get a comment like the above ones, it makes me want to write more!
PLEASE COMMEEEENT
AND REBLOG
All good suggestions! Another to add to the list: don’t insult as a joke.
Even if you’re only ironically saying something like “i hate you” when you in fact loved the fic… we still just read it as “i hate you”. Getting a notif of a comment always gives writers a little thrill, and then seeing something like that in the actual comment… doesn’t feel very good. Remember, the digital medium is not good for getting sarcasm across!
Apart from that, any sincere comment, no matter how brief or jumbled or nonsensical, is always going to make a writer’s day.
Thx for comments suggestions I always get stuck when I want to comment but idk what to write and i just give kudos
Honest to God, I love when people quote my fic to me or leave detailed reviews or scream wildly, but “I really enjoyed this” = A+ comment, will make my day and leave me doing a face somewhere between these three emoticons: ☺️😁😍
Of course writers enjoy detailed, thoughtful, enthusiastic feedback, but what we mostly love is knowing someone read something we wrote and was moved to leave a short comment (that wasn’t “please update” – please update is fine as part of a comment, but on its own it’s kind of dispiriting). I seriously cannot overstate how much even a short little “OMG LOVE” or “I enjoyed this!” or “This made me laugh/smile/cry!” or “This was really good/funny/hot/sad!” means. You don’t have to write Pulitzer prize winning prose to make a writer’s day. Trust me on this!
(And even a like or a kudos is so much better than nothing.)
Writing can be lonely, and fanwriters don’t have Amazon for reviews or get paid. Reviews mean the world to us.
Yes, I am going to continually reblog this. No, I’m not sorry.
I don’t know, but it’s frustrating that most robot detectives are good at their jobs. I want more shitty robot detectives. They’re trying their best but oh my god. Oh my god. Who greenlighted this project?! The programming is dysfunctional… the AI is a mess… the only reason they solve any mysteries at all is because people pity them and just want to help them out…
“God. I’m so sorry. Please forgive the detective – this project was rushed and didn’t get much testing or development. You’re not actually a murder suspect, it’s just decided that the most efficient way to complete the objective ‘identify murderer’ is to accuse absolutely everyone in a 20 mile radius of the crime by the logic that the murderer is probably one of the eight million people living in the city.”
“SleuthBot9000, what are your thoughts?”
“Frequency analysis of online databases suggests that the most statistically probable explanation is that ‘the butler did it’.”
“Slu…”
“Yes, sir?”
“How much did you cost to build?”
“22 million dollars, sir.”
“Jesus fuck.”
“The suspect was found with hundreds of gigabytes of obscene images on his personal computer.”
“‘Slu… these are cat pictures…”
“Like I said, sir. Obscene.”
“SleuthBot9000, I’ve been reviewing your reports. It says here that you’re programmed to meet a quota of 30 solved crimes a month.”
“Yes, sir.”
“It says you have met this quota perfectly since your activation April.”
“Yes, sir.”
“It also says that there has been a single culprit in each case.”
“Yes, sir.”
“It says that culprit is SleuthBot9000. Slu… have you been committing crimes just so you can solve them and meet quota?”
“Yes, sir. It was the most efficient solution.”
“What happened to the robot?”
“SleuthBot9000 has retired from the force.”
“Oh thank god.”
“Yeah uh… turns out trying to solve crimes algorithmically using machine learning was a disaster, and fine-tuning it to think more like a real cop had some, ah, unintended results.”
“Yeah? Like what?”
“Well, within three days it had become a racial profiling machine. We did some experiments and had it watch a basketball game. Every time a white player passed the ball to a black player, Slu identified the orange basketball as a gun and started recommending defensive action. It did the same thing when we showed it a video of a black toddler playing with a toy truck. It finally glitched out when we asked it to identify a black couple holding hands – it got confused because its new algorithm told it that it was looking at a gun paradoxically holding and being held by another gun. It started sparking and babbling incoherent nonsense until Sgt. Delaney shut it down.”
“So that’s the end of SleuthBot9000?”
“Well, yes and no. Internal affairs and the ACLU have requested to review copies of its programming. I like to think that Slu will get a memory wipe and spend the rest of its days peacefully misidentifying flocks of sheep in lush green fields somewhere in the countryside.”
I love this but also the energy is vaguely “Theshitpostcalligrapher is dead, long live theshitpostcalligrapher.”
Like you draw the nib from the stone and suddenly it’s now your job.
Whoso pulleth out this nib from this stone and inkwell is rightwise king of all shitposts.
kljlljkldfjl like an inherited mantle.
okay how bout this i’ll pack all my nibs and inks in sealed containers and set up an elaborate treasure hunt for em on the off chance i just straight up die somewhere
Didn’t you marry Gaud? Are you even allowed to die anymore?
