my favorite thing that Clark Kent does is try to figure out how a Normal Human Man would respond to getting injured
like if someone shoots at him he can say “oh he missed” and if someone tries to punch him he can kind of roll with it and barely avoid getting hit so they don’t smash their hand while going “oh ow oof what a punch ouch”
but then here comes the Joker with a comically large wooden mallet and now Clark has to figure out how Normal Human Man Clark Kent could conceivably survive this without making it obvious that he is not actually a Normal Human Man. just “oh goddammit i’ve never even seen someone get hit with one of these before, the joker’s probably seen all kinds of people get hit, he knows what this is supposed to look like but i have no goddamn idea i am so fucked”
superman may have the power of flight and super strength but clark kent has the power of improv
BUT YOU FORGOT THE BEST PART
POLITELY ASKING JOKER TO STOP
you are completely right, clark kent asking people to please stop trying to murder him is definitely way up there on the list of reasons he is amazing
Literal text (notice the naked man in Tony’s bed):
A male (!) villain insinuating Tony can’t resist him (because of his “playboy” reputation, which is a big “hmm”):
This speaks for itself:
Tony waxes poetic about Steve’s attractiveness:
Actually Tony calls Steve handsome a lot; it’s kind of a thing:
Oh and that time Namor called out Tony for sleeping with Madame Masque (after Tony said she looked like Doctor Doom) and Tony trying to swerve the convo:
That time the media was openly suspecting Tony Stark was HIV positive (this is from a comic in 1992 when AIDs was still thought of as a disease that primarily afflicted gay/bisexual men):
… Just saying, the subtext (and even the text) has been there for a long-ass time. Tony’s dating profile being set to woman and men was just more evidence on top of the pile.
Tony is so obviously bi, T’Challa knew.
Even the evilness of Victor Von Doom isn’t enough to keep tony from acknowledging how handsome he is.
More of Tony swooning over Doom (added by @i-gotta-go-good-day-bitch in the replies but i wanted to keep the ones above too).
Also added by @i-gotta-go-good-day-bitch, implications Tony and Rhodey were/are more than friends:
And I forgot to add this classic. A gutter note during the development of Iron Man vol 3 implied Tiberius and Tony had slept together (given their relationship was very much portrayed like them having been exes, this isn’t a shocker). (Link to @whatjanesays‘s blog who originally posted these images)
“better roll” meaning “roll around the hay” (so saying sexual partner). The “Ru” here is talking about Rumiko Fujikawa (who, while broken up with Tony, slept with Tiberius).
“I miss when comics weren’t political!!” the dudebros whine, apparently unaware that manly-man playboy Tony Stark has been canonically bisexual since THE 80S, a time when the majority of Americans were still quite homophobic.
