Tag: Text

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livebloggingmydescentintomadness:

you’ve probably seen posts telling you that it’s okay not to have sex if you don’t want to, that you’re never obligated to perform sexual acts if you’re uncomfortable with it

and that’s great, I’ll repeat that a thousand times, but I would just like to add that you also don’t have to sext if you don’t want to. you don’t have to send nudes if you don’t want to. you don’t have to do anything sexual if you don’t feel like it or it makes you uncomfortable, even if it’s “just” digital. 

if somebody tells you they “need” it, they’re an asshole. you don’t owe anybody anything sexual, not even if they’re your partner. you don’t have to send them anything to make them like you or keep them interested, because someone who cares more about sex than about your comfort isn’t somebody you need in your life. sex is just a want, but consent is a need.

you don’t have to sext.

you don’t have to take nudes.

you don’t have to do anything to please somebody else if you don’t want to.

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thelatestkate:

Here’s the second part of mindfulness I learned in therapy that helped me to function after a breakdown. If you, like me, were taught growing up that some emotions were unacceptable, you may need to learn to handle them now as an adult in order to be healthy. All emotions are important indicators that are there to help you.

Mindfulness 101 Comic

°˖✧*•  Shop, Patreon, Book, Mailing List *•. ✧˖°`

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elodieunderglass:

watchfor:

jadenvargen:

littlemisskissmyass:

thebestworstidea:

joey-wheeler-official:

magathapai:

gallusrostromegalus:

songofkeys:

vr-trakowski:

joey-wheeler-official:

joey-wheeler-official:

joey-wheeler-official:

there aren’t enough posts going around about the swedish cryptid known as the skvader which is a rabbit with pheasant wings and also a very good boy.

like this one dude just made a fake taxidermy and spread it around as a hoax for a good ass while and it lead to this really cool fantasy creature and i am genuinely dissapointed that it never gets used in anything

image

THE BOY

Rabbirds, by the amazing @tkingfisher/Ursula Vernon (source).  

The lack of skvaders is particularly frustrating when you realize it forms the third point of a wonderful cryptid trifecta.

You got the jackalopes, which are rabbits with antlers.

And you got the wolpertingers, which are rabbits with antlers and wings.

And then… what? Do you escalate? That’s unbalanced, those two rabbit cryptids don’t have the same number of extra things, the wolpertinger is clearly the jackalope But More.

BUT with the skvader on the other side, balance is restored. Antler rabbit, winged rabbit, winged antler rabbit. It’s a classic Venn diagram of imaginary lapine beasts, and it’s only complete if you acknowledge the fucking skvader.

Good thing Ursula’s got our back, at least.

This is a really excellent point and I applaud your advancements in Cryptid Theory.

Gentleman, if I might add:

yes you may add this

I think balance in crypdids is VERY IMPORTANT.

I like this post because as a pre-internet child I really believed jackalopes were a real thing from going out west to visit family (I was naïve and maybe gullible). Learning about this many more cryptids really warms my soul.

i like never add to posts but these r from my town and i wanted to show our pride and joy: on top of the towns mountain is a HUGE skvadern slide for all the kids to enjoy…. there’s a tube if u enter its head… cryptozoology for the whole family! 

@elodieunderglass I wasn’t going to tag you until I saw the venn diagram

I love wolpertingers – I saw one in a ripley’s believe it or not museum as a child and was profoundly affected by it.

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thebibliosphere:

systlin:

kittyknowsthings:

systlin:

mirronx:

wodneswynn:

mirronx:

wodneswynn:

rosslynpaladin:

rosslynpaladin:

systlin:

wodneswynn:

We’ve been talking a bit about disaster preparedness and end-of-the-world fantasies, so here’s something I never really see discussed:

How would a significant interruption in access to modern pharmaceuticals effect medical transition?

The only thing I can think of is I find a veterinarian (because every zombie survival team needs a veterinarian) to cut my balls off and then I start drinking pregnant horse peepee, as our foremothers once did upon the steppes of Scythia.

And I really don’t think I can find words to adequately describe how badly I want that to Not Happen.

This is a good point. I mean, you can only raid pharmacies so long.

A lot of chronic illnesses, or people using hormones, or elderly folk and disabled folk who need regular medicine are gonna have a really hard time during a larger scale disaster or transportation shutdown, it is true. It’s something to account for when one plans for “apocalypse” natural disasters or transport/power shutdowns. 

For one very, er, strong medication I am on, I have a stash of the few extra pills I have ever gotten and I’d probably spend the first few weeks of a transportation shutdown using them to nurse other people and myself through the withdrawal process of this particular drug. I have a lot of experience with this.. and enough other basic medical knowledge to become a support for the doctors and actual nurses and caregivers who will be run off their feet during such a time. I’ve learned a lot of general triage and field trauma medicine. 

Also try the fantasy webcomic White Noise. TW, It’s got a lot of mature themes and a major disruption of government, but it also features several trans characters and handles how being refugees makes their lives especially complicated.

An interesting dichotomy you run into with this sort of specfic: I definitely want to read that but I also definitely don’t want to read that

I’m pretty much prepared to just die. My mom keeps talking about fixes but without insulin it’s just delaying the inevitable. It’s fun to be confronted with that.

Well, the reason we’re asking these questions now is so that we can be sure that doesn’t happen.  Despite all the stuff about zombies and the end of the world and whatnot, this is not just idle chatter, but something that a lot of people are actually trying to find a solution to.

Like, as for me, I mostly know soils and wood, not medicine, but I definitely know my way around a laboratory.  That bit I said about drinking horse peepee was a poetic flourish; given an adequate laboratory space and a supply of pregnant mare urine, I’m confident that I could figure out homebrewed premarin.  (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Conjugated_estrogens).

I am absolutely sure that something can be done about insulin.

Like it says in the the preamble to the IWW constitution, “…we are forming the structure of the new society within the shell of the old.”

I want to believe that, but at the same time it’s very hard for me to feel like it’s worth the effort on my end. It’s kind of why my plan for like, inevitable collapse is to just make sure I’m not a burden. But I’m just a bit bleak when I think about that kind of thing in general.

You would NOT be a burden.

A person is NEVER a burden. 

Insulin can be extracted from pig and cow pancreas. You’d better believe that we’d figure out a way to keep you alive and kicking.

And there’s people with a list of a lot harder to get medication, @mirronx, me for example given I had to be reanimated last year and am still recovering from that, yet I know that @systlin Would Not let me die young without dragging me back kicking and screaming.

You’re goddamn right I wouldn’t.

I’ve talked a lot about this in the past—usually with regards to fiction and how ableism affects the “survivor narrative” cause y’know, editor and disabled—but y’know what the biggest take away from all those discussions were? The lengths to which random people on the internet, people I’m not even friends with, who spoke up and said “you’re not a burden we wouldn’t let you die.”

I still remember the one time I referred to myself as a burden and how, in the event of a zombie apocalypse I should just be left behind with a shotgun to try and buy everyone else some time, and @undead-tealeaves response was “fuck that, if you can’t run we’ll carry you” and honestly it might have been a throw away remark, it might have just been a friend reflexively knee jerking against the idea of letting me die, but it meant so much. Because it’s hard to think of your life having value when you’ve been trained to think of yourself as a burden, it’s hard to envision your survival in such circumstances when all the narratives tell you you should just die to let other people thrive. But if running this blog has taught me anything over the years, it’s to never underestimate the human capacity for kindness and sheer dogged determination to survive against the odds. We may be capable of limited survival on our own, but it’s together that we thrive.

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witch-of-the-west-country:

bogleech:

katedrawscomics:

insanitysqueen:

revolutionarykoolaid:

lollen96:

chesterpalm:

jvlianbashir:

my new favorite hobby is looking at fucked up easter lamb cakes.

those were supposed to be lambs?

I thought these were all misshapen dogs

These are only ever beaten by the terrible attempts at hedgehog cakes that I so often google to feel better about my baking ability.

cursed

WHY do they think TEETH will save it?

T E E T H

No, they thought the hedgehog cakes would save it. The teeth were there first

I wish I could find the photo of the bunny my mother made for my daughter’s 1st birthday. It looked like the victim of a nuclear accident…

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tumblunni:

batzendrick:

updatebug:

Can you even imagine being the poor alien sod responsible for auditing an earthling spaceship’s spending allowance? Like: 

“I see, and why do you require many tubes of white plant flavoured paste?” 

“Oh well, if we don’t rub that on our teeth twice daily the bacteria living in my mouth will begin to devour me teeth.” 

“…Noted.” 

“I have also noticed several large shipments of specific medications, and a variety of individually packaged absorbent material – however injury records do not show sufficient numbers to justify these recurrent deliveries.” 

“Ah, yeah, it’s not really an injury per say. As part of our natural reproductive cycle approximately half the population will shed the lining of one of their internal organs and expel it.”

“…that is the most horrifying thing that I have ever heard.”

“Yeah.”

“Does such a process not hurt?”

“That’l be what the medication’s for. Pain killers for the cramps, birth control to stop the process.” 

“…and your reasoning behind the fully functional, high-tech entertainment system?” 

“Okay, that we could probably do without. But in our defence that was actually insisted on as a standard feature of all fleet-ships expected to encounter Terrans. Admiral Plo’Kaght insisted on it. Something about bored humans and a an illegal betting ring featuring a cleaning robot with a knife strapped to it going up against a human with a mop?” 

“…I believe I should speak with my superiors.” 

I love how Stabby the Roomba has become such a consistent in-joke among these sorts of blogs.

Galactic hero stabby the roomba: his legend continues

#1yrago If patrolling US soldiers can avoid shooting civilians, why can’t US cops stop murdering unarmed black men?

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mostlysignssomeportents:

David French served as squadron judge advocate for the Second Squadron,
Third Armored Cavalry Regiment, stationed at Forward Operating Base
Caldwell in Diyala Province, Iraq; he walked patrol with other soldiers,
during which he and his colleagues confronted routine armed aggression
from insurgents out of uniform, who used IEDs as well as firearms in
their fights with US soldiers.

During his entire deployment, amid hundreds of firefights, French’s unit
killed two civilians: “one to small-arms fire and one to a wayward
artillery shell.”

So French has a question: how is it that US soldiers stationed in
hostile territory – where enemy forces mingle with civilians, where the
soldiers and the civilians don’t even share a common language – are
able to avoid killing civilians, while US police officers – whose
on-the-job mortality is far lower than HVAC repairers and construction
workers – shoot unarmed civilians, especially black people, all the
goddamned time?

French is responding to “Jack Dunphy,” the pseudonym used by a retired
LAPD officer who says the cops just can’t be blamed for murdering
unarmed black people.

https://boingboing.net/2018/04/05/americas-violent-occupiers.html

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gallusrostromegalus:

gaslightgallows:

mazarinedrake:

gallusrostromegalus:

mazarinedrake:

gallusrostromegalus:

thatgirlonstage:

gallusrostromegalus:

In unrelated news, Boromir is the only member of the fellowship of the ring that would have Valid Driver’s License in a Modern AU.

Sam has a Driver’s License but they drive on the other side of the road in Hobbiton so his isn’t valid in the rest of Middle Earth.

Frodo and Merry are Gays That Can Do Math, and therefore can’t Drive.

Pippin HAD a license but got it revoked due to Aggravated Shenanigans.

Gandalf CAN drive but is an insane paranoid hippie that hates both petrolum-based transportation and government paperwork.  He does have a pilot’s license though.  Don’t ask him to justify it unless you want a four-hour lecture on civil rights that sounds like it’s quoting law from another dimension.

Aragon can drive, quite well, but it never occured to him that he might need a license to do so on public roads.  He doesn’t know about taxes either.

Gimli travels frequently but as a diplomet and royal, never was the one in the driver’s seat.

Legolas can’t be trusted to operate a blender, much less a motor vehicle.  He will attempt to do so anyway.

I don’t know if you might’ve meant “taxis” in keeping with the driving theme but I am thoroughly and absolutely LOSING MY SHIT at the concept of Aragorn doesn’t know about taxes, Aragorn you’re gonna be king, Aragorn you’re supposed to know how to do these things, Aragorn this is THE MOST BASIC OF BASIC STATESMANSHIP.

And THE THING IS, I’m not certain it doesn’t also work canonically. Because like we can infer that Aragorn got most of his How To Be A King For Dummies lessons from the elves, and, well, do elves… have… taxes? It seems unlikely. (Do elves even have currency? There’s probably an answer to that one and I just don’t know it.) Somehow I can’t quite picture Galadriel going around Lothlorien like okay suckers pay up you’ve gotta pay a property tax on that tree you know.

So then he gets to Gondor and gets crowned and a few months later someone comes by and is like “how much are we taxing the peasants this year” and Aragorn panics and is just like “f…five? ……. too high? Too low?”

And I mean, who can blame the guy, he’s basically been wandering the wilderness for the majority of his life, it’s not like he’s ever really had personal property besides an improbable number of weapons, so he’s probably never, you know, paid taxes

Aragorn, son of Arathorn, Elessar, Isildur’s heir and rightful king of Gondor, is a tax dodger

You.
You get this.

Like this is a Modern AU where Aragon becomes Mayor of a medium-sized mountain town*, but tbh this still holds in canonverse too imho.  the first like.  3 years of Aragon Having A Real Job For The First Time That Happens To Coincidentally Be A Political Position, is him listening to people making suggestions about “So what are we taxing the pesants?” and “What’s this years Budget?” and him Turning to Arwen, one of like 4 people in all of Middle-earth with any damn sense, and saying

“Hey Babe?  What’s a Budget?”

*In this AU The Riders of Rohan are a Biker Gang and Edoras is a really nice mom-and-pop convience store/bar/mechanic/tourist trap that’s been run by “King” Teddy’s family for as long as anyone can remember.

**I think i might have come up with a “Great Westen American Roadtrip LotR AU” 

Help.

***The Hobbits are Canadians.  I know canadians drive on the same side of the road but the Idea of Sam having an invalid lisence is hysterical.

****They found the ring in the idyllic Waterton-Galcier International peace Park/The Shire, over the border where nobody thought to look for it, and end up on a quest to take it to the hellish land of raging Monsters and unlivable condiiotns known as Mount Doom/ Phoenix Arizona.

The Prancing Pony is the Pie Place in St. Mary, Montan- IT’STWO IN THE GODDMAN MORING I KNOW AO3 GOT NOMINATED FOR A HUGO BUT I DO NOT NEED TO BE WRITING THIS RIGHT NOW.

i totally am, later, but like.  when the sun is out.

Elves basically invented feudalism in Middle Earth, but like. They’re so crazy long-lived it’d be easy for an elf to amass material wealth by just not being an utter dumbass, and plus they have magic so. Do the elf-kings actually NEED anything from their vassals other than the assurance that they’ll show up with a weapon when it’s time for the next attack on Literal Satan and his Black Castle of Evil?? Do elves need to levy taxes?

And even if they do, I bet Galadriel had to go through the exact same process Aragorn did in the post above, because SHE was born in the Undying Lands where life is beautiful all the time and the trees are somehow constantly both in flower AND bearing fruit at the same time, and nobody does any labor unless they like it.

And then just to make things even worse Galadriel learned rulership from Melian, who is a Literal Angel like Gandalf and ALSO pulled all kinds of magical bullshit on her elven husband’s kingdom. What I’m saying here is the first hundred years or so of Galadriel trying to rule on her own were A Very Rocky Time for Everybody.

Which is why she made sure her daughter and grandchildren got a firm grounding in stewardship and economic theory, so they’d never have to go through that embarrassment. And lucky she did too, or Gondor’s post-war recovery would’ve been completely FUCKED.

#aragorn: hey babe what’s a budget
#arwen (already dragging him off to the bedroom): god estel you’re so fucking stupid

DRAKE YOUR TAGS

well it’s 3 AM and I made coffee, and i think this Great Western Road trip AU has legs , so I did a bad overlay and discovered the Hobbits are NOT Canadians:

image

THEY’RE CALIFORNIANS.  I like this map becuase it puts the trip in some really fun places if you fudge the route a bit:

  • The Shire is near Mendicino, CA
  • Tom Bombadil probably lives in Jackson State Forest which is a old-growth redwoods kind of place. 
  • Bree is now Yuba City, CA
  • Weathertop is Smartsville, a “Historic” ghost town that seems like a place that would harbour Nazgul
  • Rivendell is about in Lake Tahoe, maybe Trukee.
  • I CAN HEAR YOU, PERSNICKETY TOLKIEN CARTOGRAPHY PEOPLE.  WE’RE FUDgING THE ROUTE.  WHAT? YOU WANT RIVENDELL IN FUCKING *squints at map* FALLON, NV??  IT’S WAY TO PICTURESQUE TO BE THAT FAR OUT OF THE SIERRA NEVADAS.
  • moving right along
  • Moria can literally be an abandoned uranium mine.  it’s terrific.
  • Lothlorien is probably the 

    Humboldt-Toiyabe National Forest, on account of that’s the one place in Nevada that I can verify has trees.

  • …I think othornac is in Bakersfield, CA, which puts Fangorn in Sequoia National Park.  Appropriate.
  • Also Rohan is mostly in the Death Valley Area.  Kickass.
    Helms deep can be an abandonded nuclear missle silo, it’s awesome.
  • This does make most of Gondor the Los Angeles Basin tho. 
    Minas Tirith is now the bustling metropolis of… Palm Springs.
    Hm.
    eh,  Gondor’s kind of a shit country as is.
    DOES put the cave fulla ghosts in the middle of LA tho, so that’s fun.
  • Shelob lives in the Kofa Nat’l Wildlife refuge, which is IRL famous for it’s tarantulas.
  • Mt. Doom is still, of course.  Phoenix, AZ.

goddamit i’m actually going to have to write this thing now.

Have been to both Fallon, NV, and Lake Tahoe, I agree that Tahoe is a MUCH more Rivendelly kind of place. Actually I went to high school in that part of Nevada (well, the first two years anyway) and it fucking sucked. That part of the southwest is, indeed, Nazgul Country.

Hey, does this mean the Easterlings Sauron imported for the final battle are, in fact, Mormons? 😀

so @gallusrostromegalus when do preorders open?

1. @mazarinedrake HOLY SHIT YES

2. @gaslightgallows uhhhhh… Well, I have pre-orders for the Family Lore Nonfiction Book out right now, but I was wondering what I was gonna do after those ship so I think I’m gonna do this.  So expect Pre-orders to open Late 2019/early 2020?

Other things from the Notes:

Thoughts for this AU:

  • I’m playing it extremely fast and lose with travel times, distances, what governments may or may not exist, what year it even is and when the apocalypse occured.
  • JRRT built so much world he built fantasy for the next fucking century and a half so I don’t have to.  Thank you, Jonald.
  • There was at least one Apocalypse in this AU becuase the original Series is post-apocalyptic: fallen kingdoms, fading magic, long-forgotten statuary etc.  but the details of which apocalypse and how it went down have been lost to time and the collapse of widespread governance. Maybe it was a nuclear event, maybe the Wyoming Supervolcano, Maybe the Second American Civil War, maybe all 3 at the same time.  Who knows?  Not the Fellowship, which can barely collectively remember to not leave Frodo at the gas station.
  • Aragorn is a Transguy and tried out like, a zillion names before settling on Aragorn, which is why everyone he meets calls him something different
  • Barkeep, gesturing to the mysterious dude in the corner wearing sunglasses at night and indoors: Nobody really knows who he is, but I’ve heard him called… Strider.
    Pippin: what, like Homestuck?
  • Boromir has a VW bus that’s older than his crap father and has what he thinks are cool modifications to make it intoa camper van, but in reality he ripped out the seats and adhered coleman products to the walls with duct tape

  • Aragorn: “You fell!“ 

    Gandalf: "Through fire. And water.”

    Gandalf: “From the lowest dungeon to the highest peak, I fought him, the Balrog of Morgoth.”

    Gimil: “For the LAST TIME-”
    Legolas: “Dude, don’t interrupt!”
    Gandalf: “Until at last, I threw down my enemy and smote his ruin upon the mountainside.  Darkness took me. And I strayed out of thought and time. 

    Stars wheeled overhead, and every day was as long as the life age of the earth.”
    Everyone: “Oooooh!”
    Gandalf: “But it was not the end. I felt light in me again.  I’ve been sent back until my task is done.”

    Aragorn:  “Not to be a buzzkill, but I think you got high and went to a laundromat.”
    Gandalf:  “Well. I did that too.  Wonderous things they do with Bleach these days, took 30 years of grime right out!”

  • Boromir  re-appears at the coronation wearing a sombrero and explaining that “Yeah, OK, I got shot a lot and blacked out but I got Better!  Also really lost for a while.”