the airport is a muddy, magical land of extreme regulations alongside extreme social lawlessness. I hate going there but am captivated every time.
people gather at charging ports like wary creatures around a watering hole. some sorry soul is crouched defeated against a wall, tired eyes shielded by a hoodie. there is a bird loose
There is no plane on the tarmac, but it is almost time to board. You check the announcement board. Your flight is on time. You look back at the tarmac. The previous plane never left. Your flight has been delayed.
Your terminal is on the other side of the airport, and the hallways stretch on and on. You pass the same mural and a Starbucks three times. You cannot find your terminal. You check your boarding pass, and then look at the map. Your terminal is on the other side of the airport.
A child runs around the waiting area. No one is watching them. No one speaks to them. You think you have seen this child before. You leave to buy a bottle of water. The child is gone when you return. There was never a child there.
You step through the metal detector. It beeps. You step back, and the TSA agent gestures impatiently. You step through again. It beeps. You step back, and the TSA agent gestures impatiently. You step through.
The halls rumble with the sound of a hundred rolling suitcases. You only see three, and their owners stare off into the middle distance. They keep walking. Their terminal is on the other side of the airport.
The moving walkways are lined with children waiting for their parents. They huddle together and play small, mobile games. They are waiting for their parents. The stores are empty.
There is a bird hopping around the waiting area. No one acknowledges it. You do not look at it. It hops closer. It is watching you.
You wait for your bag to come out of security, but it never does. There is something in your bag. You wait for someone to speak to you, but they only murmur over the scan. There is something in your bag.
You are looking for food. You pass three bars and a gift store, but cannot find any food. Eventually, you look at a map. Your terminal is on the other side of the airport. You still cannot find food.
They call for your flight to board. You get up, but they did not call for your seating group. You sit back down. They do not call for your seating group. Your flight has been delayed.
i’m really proud of you guys, i feel like i don’t say that enough. there are so many ways you keep amazing me. please remind yourself: we’re each of us so familiar with our own quirks and talents, that it’s so so easy for us to view our traits and our selves as unremarkable when actually the right onlooker would be startled and impressed.
View yourself with as much sympathy as you would a beloved character. The people we love, in fiction and in life, are as flawed and limited as us, and we love them far more passionately than any theoretically ‘perfect’ person. You deserve to feel that way about yourself, I promise.
gaud i literally can’t even describe the experience of seeing you tentatively put the tip of the green crayon in your mouth for like the 17th time and then just suddenly chomp! chomp! the whole thing is gone and then before i can process what’s happening a whole fistful of crayons comes up to your mouth and CRONCH
just trying to hold myself accountable to promises made
gremlins! summarize the livestream for everyone who missed it
You lit things on fire, mostly yourself. And ate a lot of things that definitely Are Not Edible, including most of a confetti cannon and some keyboard keys. One of your followers gifted you a bag of walnut halves. You lit that on fire and people started bribing you over KoFi to eat that too. Shitpost Caligrapher and Fish were there. All of you were varying degrees of wasted. You got a Cool Knife. I tapped out at like 10 o’clock so I absolutely need to know if you actually ended up eating the walnut.
Overall 9/10 for the pure chaotic energy and absolute disregard for anything close to proper video etiquette
and everything but the pizza was before i had internet followers encouraging me to do dumb crap for attention, so even i have no idea what i’m gonna do next
@biggest-gaudiest-patronuses seeing all these next to each other (40 limes, 144 reeces eggs, 2000 nickles) you are the one they warn us about in math class.
