thinking about going off the rails and becoming one of those people fixated on an undeveloped character to the point where their projections and headcanons have made them into an unrecognizable fully fleshed out entity
this is unironic btw i think these people are braver and more creative than any mainstream creator and they’re the backbone of every fandom
consider this: Heaven is not happy about the whole Angel And A Demon deal, so they pull some “A Thousand Words” shit where if Aziraphale sees or tries to communicate in any way with Crowley he loses one of his feathers until he Falls, hoping that’ll keep them apart
Litcherally
bold of you to assume Falling is anywhere near painless
“Oh yeah, every time that dad forgets mom is dead, we head to the cemetery so he can see her gravestone.”
WHAT. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard some version of this awful story. Stop taking people with dementia to the cemetery. Seriously. I cringe every single time someone tells me about their “plan” to remind a loved one that their loved one is dead.
I also hear this a lot: “I keep reminding mom that her sister is dead, and sometimes she recalls it once I’ve said it.” That’s still not a good thing. Why are we trying to force people to remember that their loved ones have passed away?
If your loved one with dementia has lost track of their timeline, and forgotten that a loved one is dead, don’t remind them. What’s the point of reintroducing that kind of pain? Here’s the thing: they will forget again, and they will ask again. You’re never, ever, ever, going to “convince” them of something permanently.
Instead, do this:
“Dad, where do you think mom is?”
When he tells you the answer, repeat that answer to him and assert that it sounds correct. For example, if he says, “I think mom is at work,” say, “Yes, that sounds right, I think she must be at work.” If he says, “I think she passed away,” say, “Yes, she passed away.”
People like the answer that they gave you. Also, it takes you off the hook to “come up with something” that satisfies them. Then, twenty minutes later, when they ask where mom is, repeat what they originally told you.
I support this sentiment. Repeatedly reminding someone with faulty memory that a loved one has died isn’t a kindness, it’s a cruelty. They have to relieve the loss every time, even if they don’t remember the grief 15 minutes later.
In other words, don’t try to impose your timeline on them in order to make yourself feel better. Correcting an afflicted dementia patient will not cure them. They won’t magically return to your ‘real world’. No matter how much you might want them to.
It’s a kindness of old age, forgetting. Life can be very painful. Don’t be the one ripping off the bandage every single time.
I used to work as a companion in a nursing home where one of the patients was CONVINCED I was her sister, who’d died 40 years earlier. And every time one of the nurses said “that’s not Janet, Janet is dead, Alice, remember?” Alice would start sobbing.
So finally one day Alice did the whole “JANET IS HERE” and this nurse rather nastily went “Janet is dead” and before it could go any further I said “excuse me??? How dare you say something so horrible to my sister?”
The nurse was pissed, because I was “feeding Alice’s delusions.” Alice didn’t have delusions. Alice had Alzheimer’s.
But I made sure it went into Alice’s chart that she responded positively to being allowed to believe I was Janet. And from that point forward, only my specific patient referred to me as “Nina” in front of Alice—everyone else called me Janet, and when Alice said my name wasn’t Nina I just said “oh, it’s a nickname, that’s all.” It kept her calm and happy and not sobbing every time she saw me.
It costs zero dollars (and maybe a little bit of fast thinking) to not be an asshole to someone with Alzheimer’s or dementia. Be kind.
I wish I had heard this stuff when Grandma was still here.
I read once that you have to treat dementia patients more like it’s improv, like you have to take what they say and say to yourself “ok, and” and give them more of a story to occupy them and not just shut it down with something super harsh.
A nurse I used to work with always told us: “If a man with dementia is trying to get out of bed to go to work, don’t tell him he’s 90 and in a nursing home. Tell him it’s Sunday and he can stay in bed. If a woman with dementia is trying to stand because she wants to get her husband’s dinner out of the oven, don’t tell her he’s been dead for 20 years. Tell her you’ll do it for her and she can sit back down.”
Always remembered that, always did it. Nothing worse than hearing someone with memory loss ask the same question over and over again only to be met with: “We already told you!”
Just tell them again.
I’ve worked with elderly dementia patients, and I agree with all the above. Treat them as you’d like to be treated in the same situation.
Same. I’ve worked with patients like these and even my grandma was convinced for a day that I was my aunt. Just roll with it.
I’m posting this gif almost entirely because of this mans untuck…
dbz landing.
for a while i thought this was just reversed, but then i realised that you can’t reverse the landing.. WHAT THE F*CK. How you do that son?!
i can barely get out of bed without tripping
and then there’s this asshole
This is some graceful, superhero shit right here.
Hi yes I would like to report a lost super hero.
There’s a springboard, I think.
Even with a springboard. I remember those things from school, they didn’t give you that much boost
HI, so everyone that is amazed by this, this is a quick explanation by some ond who taught tumbling for 6 years and competed for another 5.
1. hes either on an air track (unlikely due to the amount of control) or a rod floor going into a pit with mats. A rod floor has fiberglass rods going through out it giving more bounce than a spring floor for gymnastics and less bounce than a trampoline track. And the way it looks when bouncing I would put my money on a rod floor.
2. Hes coming out of a back hand spring or a back whip, which is a traveling skill that gains more and more power if done correctly with proper form. So hes probably doing a tumbling passe that started with a roundoff into a back handspring into what’s in this gif.
3. When touching the ground out of the first skill in the gif, he first rebounds straight up. So the rebound then is turned into a front tuck kick out. BUT (!!!!) Since his momentum is moving in one direction once hes in the air again he cant change that force of movement to go in a different direction. So once hes going in this direction –> he cant change direction until hes on the ground again.
4. So what’s really cool about this is the fact hes doing a front skill going backwards. Which takes a lot of control and a lot of trust in ones body, and REALLY good coaches.
And there is no spring board here, at all. Spring boards are for vault or a mounting skill for beam and bars. And spring boards give tons of bounce if used correctly. That’s kinda the whole point, but they are hard to use with out training. So that’s a basic break down of what’s going on here!!!
